365 DotU, Day 98 Jumps Aboard The Hallelujah Bandwagon

I’m a little uncomfortable with today’s song, to be honest.

It’s not the song’s fault. I love this song. I love it in several forms, performed by a broad range of performers. That’s the problem, really. Everyone — everyone — does this damn song. Hell, I’ve performed it in public several times. I went through a period when I was singing it quite a lot, and then…well, somewhere along the line I lost the song.

I’m not sure how to explain it. I just couldn’t sing the song anymore. It got empty and weird for me, a sort of pro-forma note assembly that just didn’t work. I had, right around that time, heard a version performed by a friend that just blew me away. I heard him sing it, and I…couldn’t, anymore. I couldn’t make it real the way he had, in that moment, made it real. I came to loathe the sound of my own voice singing these words and this tune. I couldn’t feel it right, and it just stopped being music for me, so I let it go.

Today, as I was looking over the list of songs already covered for the challenge and the list of songs yet to cover, I noticed that I had put it on the list of “songs to do if you can’t do anything else.” I had looked around and found some guitar tab for it that was within my limited abilities, and I could do it. There was no real reason not to do it. It was an excuse to mess around with the new mic and with mixing my electric/acoustic guitar, so it was on the list.

For whatever reason, today I tried it. I played this damn thing until my wrists and fingers couldn’t work anymore and my voice broke, and for a few seconds at a time, sometimes in the middle of a crap take that I couldn’t use, I could almost feel the music again.



About L. M. Bernhardt

For a good long while (15 years or so), I taught philosophy at a little private university in northwest IA, and occasionally branched out into playing music, dabbling in photography, experimenting with food, and writing nonsense on my blog. The philosophy teaching part ended in 2017 (program elimination via prioritization), but never fear! I've just finished my MLIS at San Jose State University, and I'm currently on the market looking for new adventures in either philosophy or LIS. For now, I labor at a fairly interesting administrative job in order to support my dogs in the lavish manner to which they've become accustomed.
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